The M-Word

This Clementine had her first mammogram today. Before coffee even! It was a little (read: very) scary despite how nice everyone was, and about as comfortable as putting on freshly laundered jeans after you've eaten all of the pasta. Don't worry, I won't go into further detail.

All is well and I mentally yelled "CLEAR!" as I walked out of the office. I came home to eat breakfast with my main squeeze (hah! Get it?) and then took a ridiculously long nap. Even though I tried to play it off as "just something the doctor recommended, I'm sure it's nothing," I really was worried. And that's exhausting. Finally last night I had a pretty solid ugly-cry session and let myself be afraid. 

What I didn't do was let myself go down the dark tunnel of "what-if's." I stayed as much in the present, sobbing, moment as I could and told myself (say it with me), "It's going to be fine." And it is. Was that positive thinking responsible for the lump pulling a disappearing act? Not entirely, but it didn't hurt. I'm a firm believer in visualizing the results you want- your body and mind will work hard to get you there. 

The next time you're in a tight spot (I'm on fire!) it's okay to let yourself feel whatever it is you're feeling, be it fear, anger, jealousy... even ugly-cry for a little bit to help get some of that energy out. And then tell yourself it's going to be fine- the secret is believing it, even if it's only just slightly. If you can't tell yourself you're going to be fine, that's okay. Call me. We'll be afraid together and I will tell you that you're going to be amazing- and believe it.